Saturday Save

Saturday Daily entry Save~cha-ching 39 days in a row~ I snuck out of town for the last 24 hours. Gone. No house. No wireless connection. No email. No laptop. No kids. No cell phone. No pets. I did let the husband tag along because I am a kind and generous soul. I was a wild woman, carefree and without responsibility. It was brief, but it was divine. I consider it one half of my Mothers day present to myself, time out and away from the house~

m123Tomorrow is the big day. The holy Mother of all appreciation holidays. Not only do I look forward to how my daughters will spoil me, I get to spoil my own Mother. The whole day carries good vibes and I’d never turn my back on good Mamma juju.

As I’ve wandered around the Internet over the last week I’ve seen many, many good suggestions for Mothers day gifts. I’ve seen the standard ideas, some unique possibilities and a few that just raised my eyebrows and made me hope to gawd my daughters didn’t stumble across the article. When it comes down to it, I’m not really worried about what I get……..But, if I have a choice or voice in this matter I do have a few requests.

  1. Since it’s my day, no one and this includes pets, should make a single– solitary noise in the morning until I am fully awake. I’ve heard about this fairy tale called quote “sleeping in” and I’d really like to test it out. I’m fairly certain it’s just an urban myth, but like a mad scientist, I’d like to experiment~But please have the coffee fully percolated and ready for my favorite cup. You can do this silently, I have faith!  
  2. Standard, no lift a finger around the house, Mothers day rules should apply, but this year, I would like a bell. That’s right a bell. The jingle jangle of a bell would enhance my pedestal status on the couch. I’m certain.
  3. For one day, no one should text message around me. That’s right, nadda on the text messaging your friends right next to me and my pedestal. The annoying, click click click your fingers make at warp texting speed drives me batty. I know you didn’t know this bothered me so, but there. It’s out. If you must text, go to the bedroom or the bathroom. Just think of all the exercise you’ll get! It will be like watching a tennis match.
  4. Rice krispy Treats. Make a whole pan thats just for me. Say a vow to the Patron Saint Mommyday that no one will dare swipe a square or look at my feast with hungry eyes and a quivering lip. There should be no rice krispy treat guilt, on Mothers Day. Do that, make me rice krispy treats and I’ll pledge a whole ‘nother year of putting you both on a pedestal and loving the hell out of you~

That’s it. I think, that’s simple enough. Now, I’ve got to run, clean the house top to bottom, do as much laundry as I can get in before midnight, scrub some toilets…….you know, get the house prepared for my day off sort of deal~~~

Evolution of a Personal Blogger

large_writeillTrue, I never shared personal relationship status, nor play by play highlights of my comings and goings during the last 5 years of blogging. I had/have my reasons for that, many of them. Regardless of my omissions,  for me writing in this dimension always felt like deep personal individual…… anyway.

I never felt like I was holding back key ingredients, or vital information that people would benefit knowing the details. From my perspective, everything was right there within the nouns,verbs and adjectives; sentences filled with personal thought. My moods and struggles, joys and happiness are spread out like a flow chart laced through entry after entry. Perhaps it came across as riddles and mysterious to the eye who wandered upon my pages. I can appreciate that, I designed it.

Tones and Stones that moved from the left to the right. This zone has always acted as my bridge between Lavender Black and fields of contentment. Over the years I have frequently walked between the two places in my mind. I’ve shared the color and texture of the rocks I overturned, but neglected to describe the weight and location. Intentional off center distraction. But this is changing, my direction has shifted…….

In light of my recent blog-blackout, I spent the last two days printing off the entries I hadn’t saved in paper form. (I’m experiencing paranoia) I had a two year catch up and a lofty ink cartridge bill at OfficeMax. The desire to print priceless comments from readers, along with the entry is a pricey one~but worth it~ 

I was disappointed in myself for letting great lapses in entries occur. I missed a lot of personal history in my neglect. Even so, the evolving evidence of me is still found within my words and for that I was intrigued. Change in it’s subtle evolution is difficult to recognise when our noses are in such close proximity to the reality. I can barely define the incline that got me to this point. I know at times it was steep and overwhelming, while other moments I strolled across even fields.  Such is life.

I pictured a year from now. The time when I will look back at what I’ve written for the year and I already know I will see a few defining moments about myself. I will see that in April of 2009 I personally opened the window into my life, with much less smoke screen. I won’t be upset with myself for neglecting my history and I realize today I’ll probably continue past April 30th with near (notice I don’t say positively) daily entries. Printing off my last two years of blogging has me mourning all the days I’ve now lost into unreliable memories.

I’ve always struggled with my motives and purpose for blogging. That fact has always aggitated me. I dislike (hate) not understanding why I do or don’t do certain things. Be it blogging or other life choices. Many people seem confident and purpose filled with their content and roles. I’ve always been the blogger orbiting erratically without a planet to revolve around. But, I think I’m finally circling in on personal purpose. I do need a bit of gravity, not so much that I’m grounded, but enough to keep me focused. I’m gravitating to my role. Maybe in a year from now I’ll be able to define it~