Temptations of the Button Kind
Bee to the Honey
There is a button in my blogs back office that has been enticing me for over a week now. It says —–Upgrade to Atahualpa version 3.3.2 available. Install now—-That would be the template I use to contain all that you see on this page. The Mack Daddy framing, the Democracy that says, widget, you go here, font, you’re this size, pages, hold these words……Atahualpa is the church and pews and fine stained glass windows. I’ve resisted the pressure, so far, but I’m losing will power.
I wasn’t born yesterday, in fact, in light of recent discoveries, it’s apparent I was born 36 yrs, 11 months ago. Hence, I am wise, I am knowledgeable, I get to assume mature and sensible adult caution and know that clicking SOME buttons is tempting fate and all that is natural with the universe.
But I like to click buttons, a lot. I like to test things out and see what happens……usually I can’t resist. I am like like the moth to the flame, the cat to the curiosity and the fish that took the bait. Usually I~ can~ not~ help~ myself! Evidence of this button clicking, adjustment testing, irresistible urge to tamper with things, can be seen on my Twitter account. I’ve hacked and clicked, adjusted and moved so many settings that everything is whacked out and ill-functioning. Now I get to spend 1/2 of my time twittering, another 1/4 of my time in API violation solitude and the other 1/4 of the time staring at a near blank screen with a snide little sentence at the bottom of my screen mocking me with these words. “Status; There is a problem-don’t panic” ~~~ Works like a charm. I go into technology panic.
One example, of my many forms of technology panic:
- Computer screen freezes. The user (me) immediately goes for the top left red box with the X in the middle and rapid fire clicks it. I think that if I can just get the one offending and stubborn page off the computer screen life will go cozy and balanced again. click click click click, nothing. Jitters set in and I dive for the bottom bar and right click to close program. Sometimes this appears to work but things hover in no mans land, sometimes the little option won’t even present itself. Technology concrete. This usually will create irrational clicking of the spastic nature. I’ll start clicking anything and everything, thus overloading an already backed up system. At this point in time, turning off the computer won’t even work everything is so constipated. This system of panic is sort of like taking a laxative and when it hasn’t worked in 1 minute, downing 10 more for good measure. click click click click=eventual nasty overall implosion. The only recourse left is removing the battery pack from laptop and start praying for a miraculous resurrection. Hell must be the destination of anything not saved….
But I still like to click things. There could be a huge RED button that says DO NOT CLICK HERE and it would take the strength of Zeus to pull me away. I’m addicted to tampering with things I have no earthly business engaging in.
Which brings me to the Atahualpa temptation whispering in my ear… Install, upgrade, install, comeon, don’t be afraid, install, push the freaking button, you knowyawanna, Install me…what are waiting for? Version 6.6.6?
So, I am afraid. For once, I am afraid to do an upgrade, click a button, tempt the Gods of Technology. What if I upgrade and I get this :::::FATAL ERROR::::: or all my settings disappear? The truth is, if I didn’t have bad technology luck, I wouldn’t have any at all. So here’s the deal, I don’t know how much longer I can resist pushing the Install now button. So, now you know the details. If you come to visit in the next week and discover a single splash page with this dire message, you’ll know the whole story………
~R.I.P~
Here lies Provocation of Mine (d)
“Like a bee to the honey~Rebecca pushed one too many damn buttons”
The evil upgrade, Version 6.6.6…brilliant!
I’ve tried to learn patience when it comes to this sort of thing. If I can just wait a couple of seconds, things usually right themselves (not always). Try not to push that button….
Beth’s last blog post..United States of America…minus one?
Your description of the stages of screen freeze is spot on! My computer savvy friends laugh at me for my inability to handle those situations. Click … … right click … … CTRL/ALT/DEL … Mother F@#$%$%!!!!
Very funny.
Paul’s last blog post..I’m just so tired….of….
Screen Freezes should not lead to over clicking… follow me here! When your computer lets you know that too many things are happening and it needs a minute, just get up… go to the bathroom.. grab that soda you’ve been thinking about… let the dog out… something, anything. Then, often, when you return all will be right with the world. AND, if it’s not, THEN you can rant, rave, and start clicking at random LOL!
Astaryth’s last blog post..One Project Finished… Another Started!
I Love your sense of humor…lol…I am sure to get a good laugh every time I come to view your blog…today was NO exception…lol..first off the picture at the beginning of the blog set me off…love that Red “PANIC” button…made my day..and the rest of the story.
Bob
Eaglesbrother (Bob)’s last blog post..Apple Blossoms
Ha! We are definitely related! Oh mother of …..<—I stole that from you….I’ve been in hell the last week or so on a computer non-savvy level. In reality it’s Paul’s fault. I brought him a PC game he loved for Christmas(Kept him out of my hair and occupied for hours). The thing is my old computer is – well old according to the tech guys. It was 4 years old (who would of thought that was old). Long story short his game stopped working. Tech guy says the newer version computers would do the trick or upgrade which would of cost half as much over…Oh yeah, holy hell we got a new one. (Laughing insanely) I pushed one too many buttons. Tech guy has to fix it. Here’s the kicker new computer won’t play the game it’s old by computers standards and it won’t have anything to do with it…I’m in hell…truly in hell. At the very least I have a brand new computer for back-up to my laptop. Oh I’m not done. I’m very afraid to shut the damn thing off. Everytime I do it erases all the settings I input and I can’t find a way to save them…So…yeah….no…more…buttons!!(Hugs)
Indigo’s last blog post..Hazy Fog…
Oh come now, you really don’t have the gumption to upgrade? It isn’t really all that hard! After all, what does Harriet Beecher Stowe say? All serious daring starts from within! You can do it!
Backup backup backup.
Hmm.. I wonder if I have that button TOO, since we have the same template?!?
I’ll have to check it out later.. After I have, ermm, study, I’ll look into it. I have to study. Must study. Even though I’m on Twitter and reading blogs..
Heather’s last blog post..I was a DJ in my former life..
You made me laugh again. Really, I’m exactly the same way. I’m not patient enough to sit there quietly, especially when something is ill-functioning so I’ll press this, that, a combination of this & that until everything crashes and I have to call my computer-wiz sister to come fix it.
But of course, all these problems occurred BEFORE I switched to a Mac. Ever considered switching if you haven’t already?
Ang’s last blog post..Why I can’t be a ‘mommy blogger’
You really know how to push my buttons, R.
Chris’s last blog post..BBQ Pork Loin Back Ribs
I am so tempted to push the upgrade button on Blogger….but the thought of loosing my template has stopped me cold. Yet, I am thinking a change would be nice and I have even begun collecting idea’s for a new header….but, I am stalling. But, that button sure is calling me to push it.
mary’s last blog post..Where did all the good men go?
I have this SAME problem … I have the same Wordpress template as you and I’m afraid to “test the tech God’s” and upgrade … especially since I’ve been procrastinating on getting that “Dummy’s Guide to Web Design” book …
I also go all ape-shit when my computer screen crashes … I do that whole “rapid fire clicking” on the X and when that doesn’t work I make a quick bee-line for the bottom of the screen where I proceed to try and “end program” by force …
Love this! OH and thanks so very much for referring some of your beautiful friends over to my blog to read all about my subway train debacle LOL …
Nydia’s last blog post..Blog Re-run: Baby … Guess Who’s Comin’ to Dinner
[...] I haven’t pushed the Damn Button, Rebecca of little technology faith is FEARFUL ~~~ I am still holding out. I tried to get Heather, of solid faith to be the guinea pig and push [...]